Taco Hell
Part Two: Game ON
The Ceremonial Handshake.
The Ceremonial Scorekeeping. (Yes there is a lot of ceremony involved.)
My strategy was to keep pace with him, and I decided to do this for a few reasons. One, there was the intimidation factor. I wanted him to see me as an equal. Two, I wanted to cram as much into my mouth as possible before I started to feel full. (Cat informed us that it takes twenty minutes for your brain to realize how full you are.) And three, I didn't want to think too hard about what I was doing, because seriously? Those tacos started to seem a little gross.
A few notes on the process:
In the beginning you have no desire to know how many tacos you have eaten, you just want to focus on continuing. By the end you are in constant need of information. The more data, the better. How far ahead is he? How long have we been doing this? How many tacos did the other female competitor eat again?
While initially the soft tacos are tastier than the hard tacos, after a while you begin to loathe the soft tacos because they're chewier. That's right, your jaw starts to give out on you. I think in the beginning I was practically swallowing everything without chewing, but I couldn't take it after a while, and that's when I realized the true trap of the soft taco, at first so friendly and mild, but then, a big puffy mess of chew.
Eating contests are sort of boring after the first six or so. Cat left early and Matt's girlfriend started knitting in the corner. How interesting can it be to watch two people painfully chew?
You feel high pretty much as soon as you start the fourth taco, and you stay that way till you're home in bed. Tacos 5-10 you're actually capable of being funny and holding conversations, and then after that, there's nothing funny about it at all.