Got a new camera, oh yes I did. Still figuring it out
The past few days: baking, eating, driving, dancing, kissing, sleeping, working, eating, hugging, drinking, talking, drinking, talking.
I gave a few divine dirty looks.
There was one thing that happened that I can’t tell you about, and that other thing that happened that I won’t tell you about.
I found out who somebody was, and it was not who I thought it was at all.
I bought a book for a friend and she bought one for me.
I offered to babysit.
Every night my ankle vibrates with whatever I did that day. Walking, jumping, shuffling, tippy-toeing. It’s as if it’s chattering at me, is how I keep explaining it when people ask how my ankle is doing, which is nice of them to do.
I’ve been writing down story ideas, and also I’ve been coloring.
Somebody got a bad report card.
I lied when I said I was writing down story ideas. Story titles, that’s what I’ve been coming up with. Also I wrote down this: Susan. Sue. Suzy. Suze. Suzy-Q. Suuuuuuue. I could hear someone (a man) saying it to someone else (a woman named Susan) (obviously) in my head.
I got jealous, recognized the feeling for what it was, and then shifted uncomfortably in my seat.
I nearly made someone cry, but I did not mean to at all, and so I do not feel guilty. No one can make you feel guilty but yourself. Maybe you like to feel guilty. Have you ever considered that?
I saw some pictures from 4 years ago, when I was tan and healthy and much thinner and I had not been ruined by love yet and my first book had just come out and I thought I was unstoppable, and for all intents and purposes I was. What a smile on that face.
I have given up on getting that thing done.
I lied when I said love ruined me. I’m not ruined at all. I’m not perfect, but I’m not ruined.
I am just on the tip of understanding something really important. I’m going to take a lot of pictures this week until I figure it all out.
