In case you were worried about my sex drive problem, apparently I wrote it all out on Thursday night, because I spent most of the weekend in bed. With a boy, not just myself.

Yes. Ahem. So that was nice. And that's all I'm saying about that. Because for once, I can keep it to myself. Sort of, anyway.

But I had coffee with D (a boy I used to like, and then I used to dislike, and now I like him again, but not like him like him, because I already went that route with him once, and I would never do it again as he is wholly emotionally unavailable, although he makes an excellent friend) today and we chatted about our love lives, as single 29 year old Manhattanites are wont to do on the last, sunny day of a long, sunny holiday weekend. I figured he's a good one to talk to about these things. No knocking my gay boyfriends, of course, but every once in a while it's good to get some feedback from the straight boys. They know a bit better how other straight boys think.

The rest of us, we are all completely mystified, of course.

"So what are we talking about here?" he asked. "You want advice on what?"

"I want to know what you think, is all. How you would feel in a similar situation."

"How I would feel is I would never do anything like that in the first place because of how I am."

I know how he is, yes.

He continued, "I wouldn't want the woman to get the wrong idea that anything like that would ever happen again. That's something you do with a girlfriend, and I don't want a girlfriend."

"OK, but let's assume that not everyone is like you. Let's assume that there are people out there who meet women, and don't immediately freak out..." - and with that, I waved my hands in the air, like I was freaking out - "...the minute they realize a woman is cool."

I think it might have been difficult for D to put himself in that frame of mind. He's sincerely committed to being non-committal. He shook his head wearily, looked dazed.

And then he told me to never call the guy, never email him, block him on IM, don't do a damn thing to get in touch with him, and then, maybe, if I waited long enough, he'd get in touch with me. I don't really like that kind of instruction. I'm a communicator by nature, but I promised to take his advice under consideration.

D and I talked about his love life a bit more. He seemed content with it being scattershot and occasionally fulfilling. He had little hope for more than that.

"You know what sweetie? Someday you are going to find that right person. I swear. Because you are a good guy. I know it. You'll meet someone you'll like so much, that you would have to spend all your time with her. It'll drive you crazy not to be with her. It'll be like, when you're forty, but it'll happen." I said.

"And the minute I do," he said. "The minute I do, she'll run off and leave me."

"Ah," I said. "So that's it."

"Yes," he said.

We both sipped our coffee. We were sitting in the park at 1st and 1st. It's not a nice park, more concrete and playground equipment than grass and trees. There was nothing to look at but each other, so we did just that.

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