It looks like things are pretty calm tonight, so I have time to take on a little project I've been meaning to get to since last week. I received so many wonderful responses to my call for help on the ironminds piece, She Said: Five Things That Turn Women On, but I couldn't use all of them. This drove me nuts - there was so much good stuff there (I have the smartest and coolest readers in the world, yes I do) but it wouldn't have been a very effective piece had I used all of them. So, I'm going to publish some more here that I missed. I'd do them all, but I'd be here all night. Also, forgive any repetitions, but I'm going to publish entire lists. OK, enough preamble - Here we go!

Oh, lessee, there are the usual physical things I check on passersby: biceps, tight butt, broad shoulders, dark eyes, full lips. I *am* attracted to the "bad boy" type, though I don't usually like them in person. (My mom says all the women in our family love cowboys.) I don't care about hair, glasses, type of car, clothing, wealth.

What I look for when I'm actually *talking* to someone is intelligence, attention to the conversation, a sense of humor, a lack of arrogance, and an air of sensuality. Bigotry, sexism, religious zealotry, republicanism, and conspiracy theories are all major turnoffs.

In light of all that, it's hard to justify the guy I just spent three years with, but at least he's gone now. (Okay, it was the butt and the biceps.)

Kate, Durham, NC

1. Intelligence: A guy is only worth his salt if he has something intelligent to say, an argument should not be made unless backed up by something. I had in the past a tendency to date complete morons. Maybe intelligence in the book sense is not what I am looking for, possibly just to know that the man in question does think.

2. Sense of humour: I'm Irish, we are highly sarcastic and spend most of our time laughing at something or the other. My sense of humour has been construed as rudeness in Germany and pure insanity elsewhere. I need a guy who has the perfect sense of humour, otherwise I would probably make all my little smart comments to myself and end up in a mental hospital.

3. Eyes: Beautiful ones. I've never gone out with a man who wears glasses probably because I wouldnt be able to see his eyes. I love eyes that you can sink into, if the boy has a beer belly and a fat arse it doesn't matter as long as he has nice eyes.

4. Imagination: I write a little and paint and have played around with all different sort of crafts. I'd like to know that my perfect man (if there is one) would be a part time dreamer and have billions of little pictures in his head too.

Deirdre, Dublin (Ireland), College Graduate doing a bit of part time data entry while waiting to start IT Consultancy job in October

A sense of family - men who know how to balance work with the other priorities in life. I love a successful man but one who learns to let it go in the off hours.

I love it when a man is health-conscious and into physical fitness. He doesn't have to be a bona fide athlete, but someone who cares about his well-being. Men who take such great care with themselves are very attractive!

Hope these helps.

(I figured I would leave out the typical desire for tall, slim, athletic, European accent, etc.... that's a given!)

Reewa, IL

We all know how predictable some women can be on this topic ("I want a guy with a nice smile, beautiful eyes, a sense of humor, romantic, upstanding citizen...blah, blah, blah).

I must admit that's what I'm compelled to reply, almost as a reflex.

Don't get me wrong- the Prince Charming/ Romantic Artist/ Rebel with a Heart-of-Gold fantasies are nice (they've gotten me through a night or 12), but the truth is, I think (for me), finding someone attractive is a lot more carnal than that.

Give me a guy who acts on his impulses, can read my eyes, is comfortable in his own skin, has a good strong tongue and can use his hands in *all* the right ways, over the romantic, upstanding citizen with the sense of humor, nice smile & beautiful eyes, any day of the week.

Weekends, however...

Christina

Couldn't resist. Wendy, Los Angeles, Editor, and I like....

1) Haircut (I like the dark-haired, mod, messy kind.)
2) Build (Lean, not too buff, please.)
3) Armpits (something sexy about how they have fluffy, soft hair under there, compared to our prickly growth, plus--sorry--the smell is sometimes a turn-on.)
4) Style (I'm partial to the thrift-shop indie-rock-boy look. See photo.)
5) Sense of humor (self-explanatory.)

Keep going! There's one more page of goodies!

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