I decided to quit smoking again, and this time I mean it. It's been on my list of things to do for a month, and as the list whittled down, I realized I had no choice but to do it. It was time. And when something gets on my list to do, it gets done.

Accordingly, I went out yesterday morning and bought Step 1 in the 10-week Nicoderm CQ plan. (Damn, that shit's expensive.) I had been out all night, so I decided to wait until today to put it on, as I probably had enough toxins in my system, and I'm not planning on having a heart attack at the age of 29. Plus - I'll admit it - I was going to meet up with some folks for St. Patrick's Day, and I wanted to have one last romantic date with a box of Marlboro Reds, my most favorite cigarettes ever.

And now here I sit with this shiny slip of sticky paper, (which reminds me of a Biore nose strip, if you must know, sans the immediate gratification of looking at your blackheads after removal) attached to the inside of my upper arm, and I am headed down the path to recovery! Except for one thing: upon impact, this patch has completely irritated the hell out of my skin. Is that normal? Does anyone know? (And please don't send me links to "Quit smoking!" support sites,'cause that shit won't work for me.) My whole upper arm is itchy and in flames, like the strip is just one big mosquito bite that I can't scratch. Or is it psychosematic (or however the fuck you spell that word)? Do I just want to rip it off because I just love my little cancer sticks so very much?

I'm going to ride it out, though. Dante had agreed to be my non-smoking buddy as recommended in my Nicoderm information guide. That means I get to call him every time I want a cigarette and have him talk me off the proverbial ledge. So instead of talking to him three times a day, now I get to talk to him twenty times a day! Fun for me, not so much fun for him. But he promised we'd go to cafes and drink non-caffeinated beverages and chew gum together. Isn't he a good friend?

Anyway, I have ten weeks left at my job, and this plan lasts the same amount of time, so I figured I'd be clear by the summer. If I make it, I'm buying myself a bike, so I can ride around the city for three months and see new things and maybe fall in love with New York all over again. I think I'm going to make it though. It's time.

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